Thursday, July 22, 2010

I am enough.

Well, am I?

I know deep down in the furthest reaches of my mind and soul I AM enough.

However, too often my mind can get stuck in the preconceived ideas that society or I have determined what I should-be in order to be "enough". I'm not pretty enough. I'm not thin enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not wealthy enough. I am not organized enough. I'm not good enough.

And my mind makes me think sometimes that I won't be happy enough until I can achieve certain things. Lose weight. Earn more money. Get rid of debt. Clean and organize the house. Find a loving partner to share my life with. Get with it. Basically - I'm just not enough.

And then I remember. . . I AM enough. Maybe I've made mistakes. Maybe I still make mistakes. Maybe I'll always make mistakes. Maybe I'll always be in debt. Maybe I won't be 125 pounds ever again. Maybe I won't find my soul-mate and will be by myself forever. Maybe I'll continue to doubt myself based on what others think. Maybe I will always be a little messy. But maybe - just maybe - that's enough.

I've recently found my little self- life-lesson in my garden:

ME. Unfortunately, sometimes I feel like this. I feel like I'm worn out and not all I want to be. I feel like I've failed and I've let others down.

ME. Then sometimes I feel like this. I feel like part of me is not in full bloom, but that's ok - because there's still other parts of me that are shining and doing great.

ME. And then sometimes I feel like this. In full bloom. Glorious. Enough. In fact, more than enough.

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